When I graduated with a Master’s degree from Sweden, I asked Baba for just one gift: a chance to travel with him across Europe. Little did I know that this trip would become the defining standard of friendship for the Baba-Beti Duo! We visited three countries and six cities in 10 days, with rapid speed, but no one complained.
Having lived independently for a while, it was now my moment to shine. I wanted to plan and reaffirm with my father that I was one hell of a capable woman with excellent planning skills. I shortlisted Sweden, Norway, and Italy, then found flights, trains, and hotels. I emailed most of them to explain that we needed two rooms, with one being wheelchair accessible. I wanted to roll out the red carpet and hoped Europe would play host alongside me. But while I kept looking for accessible options considering my wheelchair, I completely overlooked the fact that my father is 60+, and that too should have been a consideration in planning the trip.
Baba and the Red Suitcase
When Baba arrived in Sweden to attend my graduation ceremony, what followed was a rollercoaster of emotions. I met him at the airport with flowers, and we took a few minutes to soak in the beauty of the moment. We sat down in his hotel lobby afterward to discuss the plan, and he nodded with excitement at every word, but his line of questioning was more about my diet, friends, safety, and independent life in Sweden.
He did make one unexpected complaint.
About the weather.
Not because it was cold.
But because it wasn’t!
And I had made him pack a huge red suitcase with winter layers to keep him warm. But Climate Change.
Oslo, Norway
The next day, we explored the streets of Uppsala and Stockholm, but took it all for granted. Soon after, we took one bus, one train, and one flight from Arlanda Airport to Oslo, Norway. We were an interesting team: one disabled and one 60+, yet none of the city discounts applied to us. The lady at the train ticket counter laughed and said, “Sorry, Mr. Khan, we only have discounted tickets for passengers over 66.”
We bought full tickets and got on the train that would take us to the city center and to the Smart Hotel that had a beautiful lobby. We checked into our rooms and later, Baba met me in the lobby and, to my embarrassment, said,
“Even my room at Pakistan Military Academy was bigger.”
I realized Baba is Baba—in des and pardes—and I had to stay a few steps ahead to make sure Europe lived up to his expectations. We hit the streets, explored the city center and shops, and had Thai food for lunch. I noticed many similarities: we both enjoyed experiencing the destination like curious travelers who questioned everything and everyone, and saw the world through the lens of family, military, and sometimes comedy. We both enjoyed window shopping more than actual shopping. We both preferred snacking all day instead of looking for three meals a day.
Our conversations ranged from monuments, civilizations, history to family politics, feuds, and my reckless behavior in childhood. At times, we would walk silently for a few minutes until another curious question would take us out of the Baba-Beti zone and into the curious traveler zone. I would dodge career questions and future plans, by pointing at random objects, making it look like a “not-to-be-missed attraction.”
The weather didn’t bother him, but I’m convinced I did—by making him pose for a million pictures. For moments, I became like the proud parent who wanted to document every second of her child’s success.
Instead of folding my wheelchair during travel, Baba helped open ramps on buses and press buttons to open doors in buildings. I, on the other hand, learned to slow down my speed and ask questions to ensure he was enjoying the experience. Oslo felt like a warm-up before our flight to Venezia.
Venice, Milan, and Bologna, Italy
We landed in Venezia and only had three days, so we strategized to see three cities instead of just one. We booked Hotel Plaza near the train station (Stazione di Venezia Santa Lucia) and decided to make day trips via train journey each day to make the best of it. Before each journey, we would get fruits, chocolate, yogurt, and milk—and call it breakfast.
Although we were both punctual—him because of his military background, and me, also because of his military background—our efficiency was challenged as we spent hours at the ticketing office trying to book assistance to get on the train. The service wouldn’t attend calls from us or from the ticket office, and we would sit there wondering if simply having the service is enough, or if the focus should be on making the service more responsive to avoid wasting the time of the disabled traveler.
Baba and I agreed that although no such service exists in Pakistan, within minutes, I would be on the train because people would step in to help. So, what’s more important—service or efficiency?
We took an hour-long train ride to Venice and then hopped on the ferry to enjoy the water canals. Sadly, the gondolas were not wheelchair accessible, nor was most of the built environment in Venice. This limited my mobility, and we couldn’t fully immerse ourselves in the city’s vibe, so we stayed on the outskirts and bought beret caps for both of us. We had pizza at a local pizzeria followed by gelato, and then it was time to head back.
On our ferry back to the train station, Venice was lit up with soft lights, and the buildings took the shape of book characters telling so many stories in a single glance. I saw a girl sitting on the edge of a building reading a book under a lamppost, and that moment left an imprint on me as the definition of the perfect reading spot. We both wondered why no one seemed happy sitting on the gondolas. They looked romantic, cinematic, accessible (well, not for us), and affordable, yet no smiles were in sight.
On day two, we took a short train journey to Bologna, but this time we got in character and Baba put the beret on me. We spent the day exploring the Saragozza District, which is a historic and scenic area near the train station. We had another round of pizza, gelato, followed by coffee and cake, and then called it a day.
Our third day was all about exploring Milan, and so far, it’s been my favorite of all three. We explored the City Center, Piazza del Duomo (Milan’s main square), and the Milan Cathedral (Duomo di Milano), one of the most famous Gothic cathedrals in the world, known for its elaborate façade, statues, and rooftop views of the city.
We walked around the Galleria Vittorio Emanuele II, a 19th-century shopping arcade filled with luxury brands, cafés, and beautiful glass-vaulted ceilings, and visited the Palazzo Reale (Royal Palace of Milan). While at the Leonardo da Vinci Museum, Baba said,
“I wonder why all male statues have such ripped bodies, but female ones have pouches?”
I thought the long, exciting day had ended as we sat having cake at EL&N Café when a very familiar Pakistani voice greeted my father. It was our neighbor from Pakistan! I mean, what are the odds?
The trip was coming to an end, but not the party. As we were exiting Italy, Baba didn’t want to dispose of the remaining snacks and milk. He asked the security at the airport if we could take them on board. To my surprise, they allowed us, and we happily poured milk into glasses requested from the cabin crew while on the flight, playing cards. But this party even extended to our neighbor on the flight, who was a student from Sweden.
I watched my father chat with her about his life and our recent trip, and I kept sitting there, smiling to myself about how the last ten days had helped us bond, set new examples of family connections, get some amazing pictures, and try new food. What I thought was a basic European holiday turned out to be the blueprint for the best Baba-Beti traveling duo.
Accessibility Guide
- Hotel Plaza: Fully accessible with step-free entry and elevators
- Italian Train Assistance: Exists, but hard to access or book in real-time. Book 48 hours earlier.
- Venice: Beautiful but largely inaccessible
- Bologna: Moderate accessibility and easy to navigate
- Milan: Best of the three for wheelchair-friendly travel
